“It” doesn’t determine your destiny.
Instead, you do.
Do you believe it?
This post is part of a series helping you to strive for audacious success instead of settling for ordinary results. In my last post we addressed the lies we tell about others. .
Those that follow me have seen my recent pivot from Murfield International, Inc. to my collaboration with real estate broker Patrick Lynch. Together we work to help leaders in business, real estate, and sales achieve their TOTAL Career Growth. TOTAL stands for Taking Others To Audacious Levels. To reach astounding levels we help them to think bigger, reach higher, and be willing to do what others think is impossible. To do that, we must use critical thinking. We set ourselves up for failure when we base our future on personal opinions rather than credible sources. We utilize online and in-person coaching, training, and speaking, and podcasts to help our clients.
We lie to ourselves, claiming “I am” not strong enough, smart enough, or not of the right DNA. We lie to ourselves about others, blaming them for our lack of success. In the process, we lie about our potential.
Notice how shifting from “I” to “They” and finally to “It” takes the lie to an epic level, claiming some unknown or unidentified sources prevents the audacious from happening. This last category of lies depersonalizes the situation by claiming some external power prevents us from seizing an audacious opportunity.
One of the most troublesome parts of this lie is that “it” is never specifically identified. We hide behind the ambiguous claiming something out there prevented my success.
It is . . .
- too difficult.
- too much to wish for.
- too far beyond the feasible.
- not right.
- not in the cards.
- bad karma.
- not what the universe allows.
- not God’s will.
Without a direct reference to a specific person, “it” messages shift the blame to something or someone that can never be accountable. These “it” statements become a cheap excuse similar Flip Wilson used as a comedy sketch “The Devil made me do it.” Notice how the woman in his story used an outlandish claim to deflect the responsibility. It is funny because her excuse is so transparent.
Watch Flip Wilson tell his story about how “the Deveil made her do it.”
As crazy as it sounds, we voluntarily believe many of these lies. We might have tried something once but failed. From that moment forward, we claim it was too difficult, unlikely, or not in the cards.
That’s a lie.
Quit saying it.
Quit believing it.
Instead, pivot to believe the audacious truth.
The Audacious Truth
The audacious truth is that we can do far more than what we thought we could do. We can do far more than most believe we can do. We can also do what many thought never could be done. Remember what I wrote in a previous post, impossible simply means we don’t have the resources yet. Once we have the resources, and we may already have them but not recognize them, the impossible becomes possible.
Elite athletes do this on a regular basis. They push themselves through that proverbial brick wall of limitations.
How do they do it? Some trust their talents and their passion. Some are driven to push themselves to their potential. Others trust a coach to push them when they would otherwise quit.
Some believe it is their destiny. Still others believe they have a heavenly purpose, it is God’s will for them to succeed.
Is that a lie?
I don’t think so.
When we have a vision and a purpose, we are on a mission.
It is NOT a LIE to believe in that purpose, even though you haven’t done it yet. However, it is a lie to believe the audacious success is NOT possible just because you doubt it will happen.
“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”
Do you see the difference?
Once we affirm the desired outcome, we work to make that happen. We work diligently and relentlessly to expand our knowledge, hone our skills, and adjust our attitude. That creates a champion’s mindset.
Henry Ford was correct in what he said, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right.”
“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right.”Henry Ford
Your future, no matter how small or how audacious, is your choice. You determine how great or how frustrating it will be.
The Exceptional Lie
Whenever I discuss this, some always raise the exceptions. “But what about . . .” They detail horrible things that have happened. I get it. However, they still have a choice about how they will approach life.
Look at Chad Hymas. Life was going along very well for him when he suffered a farm accident. He was left paralyzed. His future was drastically altered. But he didn’t believe the lie that his life was over. Instead, he went to work. Although he could not change the fact that he will never walk again, he could change his attitude.
That made all the difference.
Today he is a is a popular motivational speaker who travels the world, speaking to thousands, and helping many think bigger, reach higher, and do what they never thought possible.
If he can overcome those challenges, what can you overcome?
Your future is what you choose to believe it will be. Don’t believe the lie that “they” or “it” controls what you can become or what you want to achieve.
Are you in sales? Even if you haven’t made it yet, don’t believe the lie that you won’t. Shape your future.
Are you a leader seeking to lead at a higher level? What do you need to do to shape that future?
No matter what position you are in, you have far more choices than you might believe.
Believe the truth. Then work to make that your reality.
DO THE IMPOSSIBLE
Loren Murfield, PhD
I work with leaders and entrepreneurs in small business, sales and Real Estate to think bigger and reach higher to find their breakthrough success. Contact me to begin thinking bigger.